Today in January 26

Morning News:

• There's a Bun in the Oven! - Hungry conspiracy theorist  Okie lawmaker introduces a bill to ban fetuses in food:  

"No person or entity shall manufacture or knowingly sell food or any other product intended for human consumption which contains aborted human fetuses in the ingredients or which used aborted human fetuses in the research or development of any of the ingredients."

State Senator Ralph 'Shortribs' Shortey read on the interwebs somewhere that stem cells were being used as FLAVORINGS! By God, not on HIS MENU they don't!

I would name my 'product' 'Choice Cuts'...or 'And Baby Makes Brie'  'Mommy's Little Miracle Whip'...

It might be pertinent to note that this big ole slice of crazy senator pie has introduced several ridiculous bills which have never made it into law. I suspect they introduce his stuff last, over cocktails.

• AZ governor a finger pointing President nag - Governor White Woman stormed the tarmac and invited Obama to meet with her using her most welcoming scowl and mad finger gestures...and Obama opted out.  It turns out that her book, Scorpions for Breakfast, is full of LIES, NOT delicious dangerous recipes.

• Health Tip - Fry Food in Olive Oil, especially if your food was the byproduct (flavoring) of rape or incest, or will never be as cute as a puppy.

• Better than One? Baby born in Philappines with two heads. Doctors agree - odds of longterm survival are not great BUT it's too early to fry in olive oil.

 

Comments

[Jorgen]

Katy for double win!
We had department pot luck today and I told an eating fetus joke, I later noticed someone removed the scissors from my desk.
Are you news obsessed to?

[katy]

I AM news obsessed...but in this case, my daughter has to do the Morning News every day for the stranger this week...and I felt like trying it to see what it is like, getting up early, combing the various news sources and boiling it down to a few lines of what I find most interesting. She is good at this...I still suck. I'm going to try and do it for awhile until I feel I have, A) improved, and, B) become bored by it.

Good job on making everyone think twice about what they were eating. Removing your scissors.
It's not a child, it's a choice.